How to Be the Best Me Instead of A Crappy Her...

The world we live in  has a funny way of suggesting to us on a daily basis who we should be, look like, dress like, act like, represent.  It's pretty hard not to get wrapped up in trying to be someone else.  We're supposed to look like models, actresses, swimsuit covergirls, gorgeous housewives, Pottery Barn mothers, Pinterest Perfect, Martha Stewart clones.  It's no wonder we're all about to crack.  These are ridiculous expectations.  How can we be expected to live in Architectural Digest -ready homes when we have children trying to live in them?  I don't know - maybe it's magnified by the countless social media outlets that are in our face everyday.

Got this great ecard from http://planetprice.blogspot.com/ 

How do we think we can live up to the Victoria's Secret model types when we get dressed - in bikinis, daily wear, yoga pants - whatever - when they get full hair and makeup done by professionals- as well as airbrushed every time they have their photo taken?  We are lucky if we can get a shower and throw on something without stains...something that fits, that's flattering, that's somewhat in season, somewhat in style.   It's too much pressure.  It's not real. And yet we are so hard on ourselves trying to be them.  Not only do we want to be them - but we want to be perfect versions or duplicates of them - when in all honesty, they are not real versions of them!  Airbrushing, plastic surgery, cutting and cropping on the editing floor of a magazine - it's bullshit..it's not real!  Do you get how crazy this is to do to ourselves?

Take your Duckfaced, heart shaped gang signs, skinny ass,  airbrushed legs, and hair extensions and just go airbrush yourself to death ! I do NOT look like this in my VS robe.  Not. At. All.

It's time to get real.

Enough of this worshipping, aspiring to and admiring non-existent role models.  It's time to just ask ourselves who we are - and just peel back the crap until we find the truth.  Who do we want to be?  Who will we be happy with?  For me, the answer is simple.  I want to be genuine.  I want to be kind.  I want to be happy - with myself, my life, my choices.  The answer is simple - the execution might be a little harder.

The other day I got a copy of Better Homes in the mail.  I opened it up, and saw perfect hues warming the walls of a room, along with books properly distributed on a full- length bookshelf.  In the middle of the room was a  comfy - cozy couch with a throw covered with  fluffy gorgeous pillows and a little boy in a Polo shirt laughing and reading a book.  For a split second I thought - wow, how great is this room, neat, tidy, warm, cozy - perfect.  And then I force myself out of that and say - that is a studio - set up for a perfect photo to sell magazines!   Even the boy is just a prop.  Behind the scenes, there's got to be a mom waiting in the wings, holding her breath, knowing she will have to come through on a bribe she made with that little model if he behaved through the photo shoot and pretended to be perfect.  That's what helps bring me back to life as I put the magazine down. 

As we get older, so much becomes clearer.  Things that mattered yesterday, don't matter as much today. The things that filled us with joy years ago, aren't the same things that fill us with joy now.  No - now, it's the little things.  Sleep, a great meal, a healthy child, bills paid, food on the table.  Sign of the times? Maybe.  Or maybe that's all part of life.  Looking at ourselves in the mirror and saying, I'm going to be the best me I can - and focusing on that, and the beauty, strengths, and positives that we are, and that we have, instead of longing for the unreachable - the unreal.

Just trying to figure it all out...thanks for helping me.

"Stop feeling sorry for yourself because I do not associate with people who blame the world for their problems cause you're your problem Annie - and you're also your solution...."   Megan, Bridesmaids
Best movie for laughing..ever.


  1. Good Morning DG! Great timing on this piece! Love it girl! Devan

  2. Amen sister--a loud amen.


  3. oh god, if I can get my ass out the door in the morning with lipstick on, I'm winning. my house is a mess and I can't cook for shit. That's why I have a husband. He's good at that stuff. I'm just so grateful I have an apartment. YOu are beautiful and have your shit together as far as I can tell. I look up to you! xoxox

  4. I hate wearing makeup because after not wearing it daily for so long I ALWAYS poke myself in the eye with my mascara which screws up my contact lenses. Then my eyes tear up and I have to wash my face and start over. I am perfectly okay with my best self in a baseball cap, gym clothes, running shoes and a bare face. It really makes the times I make an effort to look great more fun. Great post, DG. You speaketh the truth!

  5. Hahahaha...that ecard is SO me. Pinterest is my best friend AND worst enemy!

  6. I love this post!! I hate the image the advertising world is dropping on our backs!
    To paraphrase both the Help and your previous post... Who cares what the world needs to see... "you is kind, you is special and you is important!" And you're the most beautiful you there is!!
    Have a wonderful day!!

  7. Great post! There are far too many people that are just making themselves miserable wanting things they can never have instead of enjoying the things they have already.

  8. Right here with ya. well . I just had my 1st baby at 33, & I get caught up in the perfect conundrum all too often. Gotta be the perfect mom with a clean house and a sexy wife too. Ha! I must remember what's important and whats been programmed into my mind thru media. Thanks for your post

  9. Pinterest is evil. I'm more sure now than I was this morning.
    Love your post.

  10. I say again, ligaments and tendons hold your body parts together, they are not jewelry! She needs to eat something.

  11. I only keep happy stuff on my Pinterest page, and as far as that skinny bitch goes, I gotta agree! Stop with the duck face and the heart signs. Even Ellen Degeneris is sick of that, and i kinda think that's where it started.

  12. I just love the you that you are. You're real and geniune and caring....way more of a role model than any seemingly emaciated underwear model in a magazine with photo-shopped boobs and thighs. Your boys and those sweet preschoolers you teach have a wonderful woman/mom/teacher to look up to. The more of an influence YOU are...the less of an influence the fake glossy ones are. xoxo

  13. I only joined Pinterest because it was all exclusive and you had to be "invited" and I didn't want to be all rejected and left out. So, I got the invitation from Pinterest, joined, and haven't logged on since. See, I wanted to be the rejector. BWAHAHAH.


Support random acts of kindness and leave me a nice comment..it totally counts as a good deed.