|Delete comment; ban user, delete comment; ban user, rinse and repeat over and over. Now - I finally get the meaning of this brilliant quote. I cannot expect anything to change so the decision to move on is the best one for me.|
I have said it once and I will say it again, they are the 1%. I still believe that. The very high majority of us are funny, good, optimistic, hopeful open-minded, forgiving, respectful, functioning members of society. If they see something on a page that might be questionable, they ignore it, they move on, and if they are really offended by it, they unlike the page and move on. This 1% though - no. They are not going to pass it up, they are not going to miss an opportunity to tell the world WHY it's offensive, WHY it's not funny, WHY they find it in poor taste or bad judgement. It's like they are all on high alert and reserve the right to be offended at all things.
Look, not every post, photo, blog, cartoon, whatever is going to be funny to everyone. People are different in how they interpret things - not everyone interprets the Mona Lisa the same way but you don't see people in art galleries throwing paint on it and writing WHORE in big letters do you? You don't see people throwing their Gin and Tonic on Louis C.K. while he's doing stand up because he has a foul mouth. You don't see people screaming I FIND THAT OFFFFFFENNNNNNNSIVVVVVE to Ricky Gervais when he says the most highly inappropriate things in his stand up routine. If they get hate mail in real life from their own group of conscientious objectors, then that's fine - they are getting paid millions to help those negative comments get digested. Facebook admins don't make a penny. They invest their time into making people laugh. They put their creative juices into coming up with things to post and share and laugh about. I'm not saying all FB pages are created equally. Some are in better taste than others, but in their info page, you can usually find what they are all about before you like them. And if you don't get a clear picture of that, you certainly will over a few days of reading their posts. Hitting the unlike button with one simple click is so much easier than launching a full on attack. There are of course, exceptions to every rule - if something is incredibly offensive, that it questions the very soul of freedom of speech and rocks you to your core, then you can always report a page for its extremely inappropriate content. I am not going to list examples - you can figure it out.
Personally, I always thought if I felt good about the content that I was posting, that people would respond favorably to it, even if they had varying views from my own. (Having almost 20,000 fans in 6 months would prove that to be almost true..) The other day, I realized that maybe I was totally wrong about that. Maybe the thought of creating a page to make people happy and laugh a lot is an impossible goal because there are some people in this world who live and love to be miserable and thrive off of bringing happy people down to their miserable level. Nope. Not going to happen to me. I have been through too much in my lifetime to ever let complete strangers do that to me. Sadly, the wonderful people of my page have to suffer. I know people were wondering why I couldn't just delete and ban the nasty comments and people but after the tenth time of dealing with this, I am tired of babysitting adults, and it was just time to let the page go out in a Blaze of Glory. Doesn't mean I don't adore and love the 99% because I do - truly. I appreciate and adore the thousands that read, commented, laughed, shared my days with me on a regular basis. And I already miss that - kind of like saying goodbye to a close friend who is moving away. Thank goodness I still have my blog, and I will still have my outlet on my terms without having to play referee or teacher, babysitter, or moderator on a daily basis.
In an interview with O Magazine, Maggie Gyllenhaal hit it on the head with this:
Wasn't that powerful? I cannot believe that I read that article on a day that I questioned my very purpose for creating this blog and partnered Facebook page. Those words sang to me in the most beautiful, easy to understand melody. I'm happy, I'm at peace - and I'm going to keep on blogging. Facebook was a fun run - it really, really was, but when I found myself posting something with laughter and joy, only to find someone had misconstrued and manipulated it into something quite the opposite, on more than a dozen occasions, I knew I was done swimming against the current. My heart just isn't strong enough to take the daily kidney punches and verbal abuse of those who live to bring others down. That was the extreme opposite of why I started that page in the first place.It took me a while - and it's an ongoing challenge, to be honest - to stop seeking approval. But one day, and this might sound cheesy, I took my daughter, Ramona, to see the new Muppets movie. There's a part where Kermit the Frog says, "Maybe you don't need the whole world to love you, you know? Maybe you just need one person." When I heard that, I started crying. There's just so much pressure to be a great mother, wife, friend, actress, or whatever your job may be. If some aspect of you wants everyone to universally love and understand you and approve of everything you do - well, that's a sad life. You'll bend yourself into a pretzel trying to be all these things you think you're supposed to be. These days, I'm better at saying, Wait a minute. It's all right if others don't approve, because I believe in what I'm doing........This is my work. I'm doing the best I can. I know not everyone will love it and that is fine. (Oprah magazine June 2012 as told to Crystal Martin)
I appreciate and respect each and everyone of you who have read this and allowed me to speak my peace about it. I'll be here on blogger if you ever need a smile.
Until then my loves - keep on laughing until your belly hurts - be kind to each other - and thank you for being here,