Sunday

If you want to find a reason not to laugh - you will.



When I first started my blog and counterpart Facebook page, it was because I was feeling low.  It was winter in New England.  Cold, dreary and filled with the blahs, I asked myself what has become of this crazy world.  I'd turn on the news and get depressed, I'd read the paper and take two more steps back, I'd scroll through Facebook and see the image of perfection every where I looked.  Why does it feel like everyone has their shit together but me?  Surely I can't be the only one feeling like this.  After reading a few other sarcastic blogs, I found the courage to put into words how imperfect I was - and to laugh about it, in hopes that others would laugh, too.  I kind of thought that my contribution to this ailing society we live in is a dose of the best medicine - laughter.  So my goal was two simple things;  to laugh - and be laughed at or with - it didn't matter to me as long as they were laughing.  Little did I know, it too would be like swimming upstream and trying not to drown in the meantime from countless forces trying to fight me and the tide.

I've been called names, I've been told I am not funny, I've been told a joke I posted doesn't make sense.  I've been told this or that is 'no laughing matter' - I've been a victim of people mistreating me and calling me all sorts of crazy, un-ladylike things for the smallest, most innocent and even ridiculous posts.  I have never ever been racist, degrading, inappropriate, unkind, none of it.  If poking fun of someone for tanning so much they are a shade of dark orange makes me a bad person - then I guess I am a bad person.  If using curse words now and again to tell a story or a joke makes me someone who is not classy then so be it.  No one knows that I am the first person to volunteer for things - especially when it comes to helping the less fortunate.  No one knows that if I have $5.00 in my pocket, I give $4.99 of it away.  I don't need to sit here and list my credentials on why I am a decent human being.  I just am.  I am good, I am kind, and I love to laugh.  And yet the name calling and joke killing continues.



Here's the thing though.  Out of almost 16,000 people, I can count about 20 people that have done this - but it's those 20 that hurt the most.  Squeaky wheels that get the grease?  These 20 people in all of our lives are why we say "mean people suck"  or "I would be a people person, but I hate people.." and so many other one liners about hating being around people.  So all of this makes me ponder one question...

Why let the 1% ruin it for the 99% that are good?  WE are the 99% - and we are funny, sarcastic, smart, classy, wonderful people that CAN take a joke, that CAN laugh at ourselves, that CAN appreciate laughing to get through the day.

I believe this you know.  I do believe that the majority - and I mean strong majority of people are good - but when the bad come out and try to ruin it - we remember them because they inflict so much pain and damage with their words disguised as 'opinions' and 'statements' and they have rights too and blah blah blah that they actually suck the energy right out of a funny post.  Wait a minute.  Last I checked - this was MY humor page and MY outlet and so I consider it like MY house.  So when people come to MY house and disrespect me or deconstruct a joke and get everyone all pissed off by their buzzkilling nature, I get prickly.  I hate banning people.  I hate deleting comments.  And OMG do I hate babysitting adults.  Why can't people just be cool.  Don't like a joke?   Then move along - ignore it - or better yet - unlike the page or don't read it!  Why would you take time out of your precious life to type a statement on why a joke is NOT funny.  Why do people do that?  Because some people thrive on being miserable.  And misery loves company.



It's sad.  There's enough to deal with in our world as it is.  It's sad that even the people who are trying to make light of a scary world get shit on so much - daily.  People call them trolls - but trolls set out to hurt and trash pages.  These people are worse than trolls because they are wolves in sheep's clothing.  They turn the tables on you and tell you why you are the bad person for making a joke about something that isn't funny.  The thing about humor is that if there is no victim, there is no joke.  Humor is making fun of the absurd or ridiculous.  And there is a whole lot of ridiculous in this world.

One thing I have learned is that I have stopped trying to make people happy.  My definition of happy and someone else's definition of happy are clearly two very different things.  Some people are only happy being miserable.  No thank you.

I try to be positive and upbeat.  Respectful and genuine.  Thoughtful and kind.  The 1% don't care about those things.  They will be themselves no matter how something is presented - they are assholes.  That is that.  They will find a reason NOT to laugh every time.  Whether it's pretending something is offensive or saying it doesn't make sense or debating on why something is not funny - they will find a reason to kill the joke.  I will continue to ban these people on my page.  I would not put up with someone like that in real life - why would I put up with that in cyber space?



It's sad but so are they.  I would feel sorry for them - but they don't want that.  They want me to join them and I will not do that.  I will continue to be me - I will continue on my quest to make the world a funnier, happier place, and I will continue to strongly believe that we, the funny, the brave, the kind, the happy, are truly the 99%.  It is for these people that I will keep doing what I'm doing.  I appreciate you, I thank you for your support - and if you've read this far, thank you for letting me vent.

Peace and Love - Laughter too..
DG

36 comments:

  1. My dear DG, I am so sorry that you have a couple of asshats ruining it for the rest. This is a constant struggle and unfortunately, I don't have a good answer for you. All I can say is, Fuck em if they can't take a joke because I think you're great and super funny and you shouldn't let them get you down.

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    1. When you write your book, be sure to include a chapter on Asshats, Killjoys and Buzzkills. Love and admiration always - and thanks for your support. xo I would love to borrow your Coat of Thick Skin when you have a chance. xo

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  2. Is it like when we were in school and were told that some of the kids who said note things were just jealous? Are they misunderstanding the title of your blog right off the bat? Sorry for the drama you're enduring ,but thank you for entertaining the rest of us!

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    1. Ugh! My autocorrect is acting crazy, and I thought I corrected its corrections...that should say mean things, instead of note things...

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    2. I hate autocorrect....but I love your comments! xo

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  3. You hit the nail on the head with your definition of happy and someone else's being different. There is no possible way to make everyone happy, so concentrate on who is important - you!

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  4. You know, I don't get every joke. I don't find all jokes funny, but that hardly means I should blast those with a different sense of humor or those who do get it. Besides, I know if I stick around long enough, then I will get the next joke, and I will laugh myself silly. I love stalking your blog, just had to throw that out there.

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    1. Very well said Dani..I agree. Thanks for stalking..I mean reading! xo

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  5. DG...YOU are my blogging rock. We may have different voices and write on different subjects but that doesn't change my admiration for you. I started my blog because I read yours. You are relatable and THAT is what makes me click on your blog to read each and every time. The moment you start catering to people who you think want to hear this or that, is the moment you lose YOUR voice. Keep doing what you're doing on your blog, facebook page, everywhere. Because you're pretty damn awesome. You didn't come by this many friends, followers, readers by mistake. It's because they can see a glimmer of their own lives in what you write. That's all people really want. I love you to pieces. Keep on, pretty lady! xoxo

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    1. I am constantly blown away by the kindess you give me - and so many others. xo Thank you Bliss.

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  6. Here's My motto: Mean People Suck! Just Be Nice, Dammit!

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  7. You are an amazing writer. Screw the fuckers that don't get it my dear...I KNOW, as do many people, what that soul of yours is all about. Nothing but good and kind and wonderful. I say FUCK 'em. ;)

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  8. Thanks for writing this. About a month ago someone anonymously wrote a mean comment on a blog post of mine. It was the first time it had happened and it really bothered me, so much so that I haven't written anything since..until yesterday. I couldn't understand why someone would bring negativity into a place that was so positive. I had to remind myself that my blog was my space and that I allowed others to enter. So today was a good time for me to read this post of yours. Reiteration that I'm not alone!

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  9. I love that you said that some people are just happy being miserable. This is SO true! It is really sad. It's much easier and fun to be happy and laugh. If I don't get a joke, I laugh at myself for not getting it. The miserable haters who sit in the dark huddled over their laptop, their beady eyes scouring the internet for someplace they can be an asshole can fuck off.

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  10. Found your blog a few weeks ago, been checking in regularly and enjoying it. Ignore the haters!

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  11. The real problem is that the 1% of asshats out there feel it is their job to write something everytime they get offended while the other 99% of us can read your blog, like it and agree with it but not always feel we need to make a comment (or maybe don't always have time, ahem, sorry :( ). If the 99% of us made a comment every time we agreed with you or laughed with you it would show that 1% just how insignificant they are. Sorry you're getting these asshat comments, ignore them because to the rest of us we think you're a riot!

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  12. I think you are an amazing and strong woman doing your best to get through a day. Usually it's the jealous posers who have issues & something negative to say.
    If they don't like it - well, don't flippin' read! I love your page & I think you've got plenty of great stuff as well as funnies... Keep it coming... You rock sista! And I loves ya ta pieces :)

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  13. You are amazing and wonderful and never be afraid to stand your ground and protect your house. We have your back! The 99% are what matters. The 1% need to sod off!!!!!!!! No one can change YOUR reality by being an asshat!!!!! They have no lives and just can't handle that you are so wonderful :-)

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  14. I love this. It's not worth the time or energy to walk on eggshells to try to not offend the perpetually offended. The heck with 'em. If they don't like it, they can just go away and let the rest of us alone!

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  15. Well you know where I stand on this;) It is so freakin annoying when people add their unwanted, COMPLETELY unsolicited two cents. I can't stand it. GO elsewhere and stop trying to ruin it for everyone else. I Love you as always. Keep on doing what you are doing!!! xoxo

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  16. Fuggem, girl. Just fuggem! I am still surprised at how many people are out there that have nothing better to do with their time than be mean. I thought that was just in real life and maybe the interwebs were immune. It really is okay. They are every where and as long as we don't let them steal our sunshine, we'll be just fine. Like I always say, "It ain't like they can take my birthday way!" ; )

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  17. I JUST started publicizing my blog and I fear the asshats and trolls that will be nasty to me. My blog deals with my struggles with a mood disorder and my life as a Mom. I just found your page with this post and will be back. I curse like a truck driver, but I am still classy and so my dear are you. It takes an amazingly strong person to share their demons and insecurities with others- even anonymously. Much love and much laughter!
    ~mb

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  18. Love, love, love your blog and your Facebook page! Can't stand when people have to have an opinion on everything, why can't they just go away? Keep up the awesome work, and remember, this is ultimately your outlet, you aren't accountable to any of us!

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  19. You know, I say screw 'em. Some people have no sense of humor. People don't get that a person can be both kind and sarcastic. I get told I'm mean both in real life and on my blog. I'm tired of caring. I know who I am and where I stand. I love your stuff, so keep it up and I'll be there with you the whole way!

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  20. 2 basic rules people "Treat others like you want to be treated" and "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." If everyone could just follow those, the world would be almost perfect! I'm sorry you're dealing with stupid jerks. - just keep swimming (which also happens to be good advice for you right now)

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  21. don't let the haters get you down (I know, I know, easier said than done). we LOVE what you do, and most of us look forward to hearing from you each day. keep on giving us what we want—laughter—and most importantly, enjoy your outlet. hugs and love!!!

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  22. I think your posts are Fab-U-Lous! It's one thing to disagree with something but quite another to turn into an asshat on someone because you don't agree. Ignore the haters!

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  23. People will always find a way to be buzz kills. Sucky things happen in life, and if you can't find a way to laugh about them, you'll go crazy...

    This next sentence will sound heavy, but it is in no way meant to be. My dad killed himself 5 years ago. Ok, now that that is out of the way, this is what I was getting at... people say things as figures of speech, or make jokes that contain 'I wanted to kill myself' usually as an expression of embarrassment. I had a friend say something like this the other day on fb, and I had to defend her to the buzz kills. 'Suicide isn't funny, blah, blah'. I actually commented to the effect of 'Get a sense of humor. My dad killed himself, and I find what (friend's name) wrote here to be funny. You can't get your panties in a twist over everything.'

    I've even cracked the jokes myself... When the B's lost a couple weeks ago, I texted a friend saying 'Are you still alive? Please stay FAR away from the Tobin tonight.'

    Sorry for the long windedness... what I meant to say was LIGHTEN THE EFF UP PEOPLE.

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  24. This is my first visit here. I'm sorry you have to deal with the trolls but it happens to the best of us. My two words of wisdom, haters gonna hate, so you just keep doing what you do. They will find a way to be negative about anything and everything. It's what haters do. Just ignore them, keep your chin up, and keep on rolling (over them if the opportunity presents its self). :)

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  25. For the life of me, I can NOT figure out why people read stuff they don't like. I just don't even kinda get it. I don't have that kind of time. We 99% love you just like you are, please always remember that!
    Devan

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  26. PEOPLE ARE UNBELIEVABLE! I beg for comments on my blog and hardly a sole says anything. Instead, my friends send me random texts about what I've said. "POST IT!!!" I always tell them...to no avail. But good grief!!!! If people have nothing better to do with their lives than sit and stew and say ugly things about your blog, they need to MOVE ON!!! Keep your head up and if I were you, delete them immediately. Remember: Say what's on your heart because those that matter don't care and those that don't care, don't matter. :)

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    1. OMG - same thing here. Why can they not post it on the blog? Instead it's on Facebook or a text. People! Make me look like I have a readership! Lol.
      All this troll stuff scares me a little though. I'm reading a lot of it lately.
      Why all the hatin' we could all use a laugh! Great blog name, btw!

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  27. If you had $5 you'd only give away $4.99? JUST KIDDING!
    People can really suck, but yeah, people can be amazing too.
    I started a blog for the same reasons you did and it really is great
    to have a creative outlet with which to poke fun of and laugh at life's absurdities.
    It's definitely good medicine and lets us know that there's people out there who
    are going through the same things we are. Your blog is terrific! I found you on
    A day when I thought my kid was gonna drive me completely bonkers with
    Star Wars. Thanks to you, I now know who Darth Moll is. May the Force Be With You!

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  28. I just started reading your blog and think you're fabulous! I look forward to your posts knowing I will smile, laugh, and nod my head in agreement. Keep up the snark and fun!

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  29. I'm neww to your blog. I was told it was hilarious by someone who is hilarious, so I trust they know what hilarious is. I love your sarcasm, wit, and general way of looking at life. And I don't like those kinds of other people you talked about. Boo. How to you block someone from your site?

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