This is not another bitch session. Not griping. Not complaining. This is just going to be a simple statement of me putting an end to this silliness so we can stop believing in these ridiculous sayings, and change them around a little. I refuse to let wives' tales and the bastardization of stories and sayings throughout the ages be dictated to me as fact when they are simply ludicrous and untrue. I will not accept this garbage as the norm anymore. If we stop believing in this hooey and start testing it - defying it rather, proving it is simply untrue, it will release the paralyzing control it has on us. It's time to start calling bullshit on these sayings.
First of all, let's start with Murphy.
"This so-called ‘law’ says that ‘Anything that can go wrong will go wrong’.
The ‘Murphy’ in the expression is commonly believed to be a certain Captain Edward A. Murphy, who was an American aerospace engineer back in 1949.
During experiments, Murphy, whose relationship with his research team was not as good as it could have been, often used to complain that ‘if things could be done wrongly, they would be’.
It wasn’t long before the team members started referring to this idea as ‘Murphy’s Law’!"
So what I am reading here is that Captain Douchebag Murphy, brilliant as he may have been was a big fat whiny complainer. He didn't get along with his teammates and chastised them for making mistakes, and even made fun of them by saying that basically whatever they are doing, they are doing wrong.
"One day, after finding that a transducer was wired wrong, he cursed the technician responsible and said, "If there is any way to do it wrong, he'll find it."
The contractor's project manager kept a list of "laws" and added this one, which he called Murphy's Law."
And then apparently, Murph the Jerk met his untimely death in this fashion.
"One dark evening (in the U.S.), Mr. Murphy's car ran out of gas. As he hitchhiked to a gas station, while facing traffic and wearing white, he was struck from behind by a British tourist who was driving on the wrong side of the road."
*Shrugs* Sounds like a case of someone was an asshole most of his life and he left the earth prematurely in an unattractive way. Maybe he tested and proved the theory of 'finally getting what was coming to him.' (Another statement I personally loathe about karma and paybacks).
If you ask me - society morphed this idiot into a right- to- ruin people law. Something goes terribly wrong "Murphy's Law." You're running late for an appointment because you couldn't get your shit together to get out of the door on time? "Murphy's Law." Elevator door closes as the people inside of it pretend to care and try to stop it but not really. "Murphy's Law." We don't blame ourselves or the selfishness of people around us - we chock it up to the Murphster.
Stop this. Stop it now. The more power we give to Murphy's Law, the more momentum it will gain. You are trying to get somewhere fast - you hit every red light known to man. You start cursing and banging on your steering wheel and blaming Murphy's Law - transferring your energy into this phenomenon that is going to inevitably get you pulled over by the police, thus making you even later, or even worse, in an accident.
Then you'll say - "Great - what else can go wrong?"
STOP SAYING THAT!
Or maybe - WHEN IT RAINS, IT POURS! (Believe it or not, we can thank Morton's Salt for this one).
No No No. That's not even true - that doesn't make any sense. When it rains, sometimes it just drizzles and then stops. It doesn't always POUR. That story is over - done - overplayed. No. Don't buy into that. It's like saying well, if things are going to go wrong, they are going to go VERY wrong. It freaks everyone out like all of a sudden because you got a flat tire on the way to work, you'll end up with 2 more horrible things happening to you before the day is over. 'Bad things always happen in threes you know!' This comes from the 14th century group of extreme downers that thought that misfortune does not come alone. Give me a break - do you really believe that garbage? So something bad happens - are you really going to sit there and throw the towel in and wait for 2 more things to happen to make it a Trifecta of shittiness? No thanks! I'm going to quote Public Enemy on this and say... DON'T DON'T DON'T DON'T - DON'T BELIEVE THE HYPE!
So you shrug again. "Everything happens for a reason." BULLSHIT. No - it doesn't. Sometimes things happen because you were dicking around on the Internet for too long and you made yourself late for an appointment and were rushing through a light and got pulled over. What possible reason could there be for that? It's totally ridiculous crap they have been feeding us for years!
"Wouldn't it figure?" Woe-is-fucking-me. Boo hoo - wouldn't it figure that you couldn't get your shit together long enough to prevent yourself from being late in the first place? Wouldn't WHAT figure? Stop the poor me thing already - it's not suiting to anyone. Just once, plan ahead - figure things out - be prepared - and you'll see that with a positive attitude and some readiness, things will go smoother.
"If it wasn't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all..." Snap out of it Eeyore. Seriously? You create your own aura. You want a bad aura? You keep pretending to be miserable and whiny and complain about everything. You want to be successful and happy - then it starts with YOU. Seriously.
"There's always tomorrow." Again. No. Fix it today. You don't know if there's a tomorrow. You aren't Clarice from Rudolph. God I hate that part of the movie - it sucks. Nothing like brushing something off and putting it on tomorrow's shoulders. Today gets off too easily too much of the time. Why not fix it - deal with it - spit in its eye and say - no - you don't do this to me - I'm taking the control back today.
"If it wasn't this, it would be something else." More bologna. More cop outs. What kind of something else were you hoping for? Are you that convinced that you are a target for bad karma that you just accept your fate as someone with a tendency toward bad luck? It doesn't hold any water - these theories - they are nothing but excuses for why things keep going wrong.
What about not blowing all the candles out on your cake? No wishes for you - God forbid you get a weird wind or mis-breath and don't quite get them out. What is this, the soup nazi episode of Seinfeld? NO WISH FOR YOU!
How about breaking a mirror? People think they are doomed for 7 years. NO! So what - toss the mirror and clean up the mess - if you get cut while cleaning it, it is because broken glass is sharp - not because of luck.
Stop letting luck and these superstitions and saying have so much control over us. Let's start giving ourselves the energy we spent on worrying about this silly stuff and see how far that energy can propel us into doing what makes us happy, what brings us good fortune, what makes us thrive. Let's set ourselves up for success even if it means 'going the extra mile' and being mentally and physically prepared for challenges ahead. The less energy we put into believing in this nonsense, the less hold it has on our psyche.
That's all for today - I feel better calling bullshit on this stuff.
Until next time - thanks for reading - and remember to grab today by the junk and show the here and now who's boss...