I Should've Gotten My Degree in Multi-tasking

Had I known I'd be juggling three boys for a living, I would've paid attention at the circus instead of scarfing down popcorn and cotton candy.

Friends I am not going to sugar coat it.  This week has been brutal.  Three boys.  Three schools.  Three sports.  One mom.  Gotta love Hubs - he's trying to work for a living so we can eat and have a place to live and as soon as he gets home, he's running around, too.  It's been a tough adjustment jumping from the very lazy days of summer into the deep end of school days and trying to swim .  Guess who is drowning already..Mommy.

First of all, I am fully aware that I chose to have three gloriously beautiful, smart, witty, (need I go on?) children.  It was hard balancing everything when they were babies and people said - "wait until they are all in school.." to which I mentally replied, "oh shut your pie hole!"  Well, I hate to say, they were right.  Yes, it is difficult to be the full time Agent of three busy little bees.  I've never been that mom who feels their children have to be involved in sports every single season, multiple extra-curriculars, etc.  I'm that mom who thinks kids should have time to be kids.  However, when your child is begging you to play sports, do you say no?  Me thinks not.  They are not suffering at all - I, on the other hand, am a different story.

In a day, we have three different drop off at school times, three different pick up from school times, and three different sports start/end times.  Problem:  only one me.  So far, I've managed to make it work, mainly by pretending I am a pinball bouncing from one point to another with about three minutes in between to throw something down their chutes for nourishment.  Me - I'm living on handfuls of m&ms and coffee and it seems to be working just fine, thank you.  (Kidding, I am stopping here and there for a Balance bar of some sort - hoping the name is more than just clever advertising to sell the idea that Balance is attainable in three bites of a glorious chocolately bar).  Thankfully, Hubs is able to help after work as well.

First World Problems Lady gets it.

This morning, I had approximately 22 minutes to get myself ready to start the day.  I spent the morning packing lunches, making breakfast, helping them get dressed, tidying up the kitchen (why don't I leave that for later you ask? because I have some kind of OCD that I can't leave a dirty kitchen in case something happens to me while I'm out doing errands - what will they say? You should've seen her house - who leaves their house like that? Tsk Tsk.)  (("They" refers to an elite set of imaginary old Greek women who sit around atop Mt. Olympus and gossip while dipping their cookies in coffee and set a precedent that all of us have to follow to a T so "they" don't point fingers at us and our mothers for raising us wrong..))  Greek girls have a natural born instinct to fear what "they" will say should we stray from the norm.  Where was I? Yes, I need to clean the kitchen before leaving.  Anyhow.  The boys are hanging out, playing with this and that, (in other words, spraying Legos everywhere so I can scurry around to clean those up, too, before I leave).  I run upstairs - I have three simple tasks to accomplish:  Brush teeth, wash face, get dressed.  Did you count them?  Three.

Have you seen the Athenos Feta Yia Yia?  This is a good example of who "they" are.  I borrowed Athenos' Yia Yia for this meme...."they don't walk around barefoot in the house.."  They also don't "sit on the edge of the bed, wear a nightgown without a robe, or leave beds unmade!"  Tough group this bunch of YiaYias, I'll tell you!

Guess how many three turned into....

Picture this.  I run upstairs.  Go into the bathroom.  Put toothpaste on my toothbrush.  It's the last dollop.  I let the motor on my electric toothbrush buzz away while I run up to the attic where I keep my entire stash of toothpaste, etc..and grab a box of toothpaste.  Still brushing my teeth, I notice a bag of clothes I've been meaning to drop off at the Salvation Army.  I turn my toothbrush off because I now need both hands.  I'm biting down on the toothbrush with my teeth, holding a box of toothpaste in one hand, and grab the bag of clothes in the other.  Scampering down the stairs, I trip on something that 'someone' left on the attic steps because they were too lazy to take it to the top and drop the toothpaste to grab the rail.  I can hear it now, 'they,' the old ladies, chattering.."They don't walk around while brushing their teeth...if she would've remembered that, they wouldn't have found her at the bottom of the stairs with a toothbrush jammed into her esophagus.."   That'll show me to walk and brush.  I regroup, thankful I didn't fall down the stairs.  Incidentally, I have found I get more done while brushing my teeth AND walking around then you would ever even believe.  Multi-tasking, people...multi-tasking.

I go in, spit, look up, and realize I have toothpaste all over my tshirt which I can only assume is there from my near-spill.  Luckily, I haven't gotten dressed yet.  I set the bag of clothes down and think, I should just grab that pile of clothes in the boys' room that doesn't fit.... I stop what I'm doing in the bathroom and head to their room with the bag of clothes.  I turn on the light, see their unmade beds and sigh.  I quickly make both of their beds, raise their shade, find a pile of Legos under the table and stop to clean that up, but while looking under the table, I find a superhero that Youngest had been crying about saying that he'd lost.  I stop, go downstairs and tell him what I'd found.  He's ecstatic.  Once down there, I realize that the bathroom light is on.  I go into the bathroom and see 3 globs of toothpaste in the sink, toothbrushes thrown everywhere, water all over the vanity and the floor, the toilet seat up, pee on the seat and the towel in a ball on the  laundry basket. 

My blood pressure.  It's rising.  I put the toothbrushes and toothpaste away.  I'm happy that they took the initiative to brush without me asking.  I clean and scrub the sink, the vanity, the toilet, the floor, grab the towel and throw it over my shoulder, and take out a clean fresh towel.  Bathroom is clean.  I run upstairs to throw the towel in the washing machine on my way to getting dressed - when I see that I have forgotten to put the washed clothes into the dryer.  I open the dryer to put the washed clothes into the dryer and guess what I find?  Another load of clothes that need folded - that I forgot to fold last night because I got sidetracked by Eldest needing me to re-thread his football belt into his pants (have you done this? It's MADDENING...what idiot man designed football pants?)  I cannot take the laundry out of the dryer like this because it's a wrinkled mess.  I do what any normal mom would do at this point and re-start the dryer, knowing that a good 5 minute re-fresh will help with the wrinkles.  I throw the dirty towel on the floor in front of the washer and go to get dressed. 

I throw on something quickly and glance at the time.  I have two minutes left if I want to get everyone to school on time.  I take a quick look in the mirror to make sure I'm not a disheveled mess, and notice two things.  One - ring around the eyes from a combination of yesterday's mascara that I was too lazy last night to wash off after the football pants ordeal, and two - lick marks on the mirror that are so grimy and gross, I have to stop what I'm doing to go and grab Windex.  I do a quick wipe of the mirror, go and grab an Oil of Olay lazy girl's face wash wipe and rub under my eyes as fast as I can, and run back downstairs.  I'll just have to wash my face...later.

Raccoon eyes are only cute on Raccoons.

I get everyone lined up and ready - backpacks, lunches, shoes on, etc.  And I hear the dryer bell ding upstairs.  Oh no, not again..I can't leave it again.  Or can I?  I look at the time.  Nope.  No time.  I get them in the car, drop them off on time, leave them happy and with a kiss, and drive away.  I go, in peace, to the grocery store, take my time shopping, stop at CVS to pick up some odds and ends, and head home.

When I get home, I see that one of the cats has thrown up all over my rug in front of the door.  I remove the disgusting pile of sick to find a lovely wet ring around my rug.  I throw it aside while I put all of my groceries away  - only to find that I need to organize my refrigerator because things have gotten out of hand with leftovers, expired food, and what not from a very busy week of running in and out.  I speed clean the fridge, organize the food, get everything put away and feel happy that job is done.  When I do a visual assessment of the kitchen, I notice the rug in the corner. I run upstairs to throw it in the laundry, only to find I am back at square one. 

LOL...he's got a point. 

I hit the dryer for 10 more minutes and decide to tidy up while I wait, insisting I stay close by so I can hear the ding of the dryer and finish the task once and for all.  I step into the boys' bedroom to find the light is still on, the Legos are still there, and the bag of clothes is waiting to go to Salvation Army.

And you wonder why I am a little off? 

Keep on multitasking'll all get done somehow right?
PS - - - I would like to summarize my day in one song from the movie Mambo Kings...this one:  ENJOY.


  1. Hang in'll get better...if not, I'll send you M&M's. Big love, Cyn (A.D,D. Music Mamma)

  2. OMG! I so get that! The WORST for me was a year ago, when the Hub was on active duty for a year, or 4....lost count........HS Football, HS Soccer, MS XC just in the fall. Spring was WORSE. Add in all the academic, music,'s no wonder I discovered the blog "Moms Who Love Wine"!.......highly recommended, BTW...

  3. Had I known that I would have four boys, I would have gotten my degree in Sports Medicine/Athletic Training. I think it would have paid off many times over by now!

    I do need to make my husband read this post though - maybe he'd understand then why I'm always the last one in the car when we leave for any kind of outing.

  4. Oh my gosh-I love you!! You cack me up and sound sooo like me! I only have two boys, but I have a Greek mother-in-law. Hilarious! :-)

  5. Holy crap, it's amazing you're not locked away in an asylum somewhere by now! I'm pretty sure I would be!

  6. When I got to the old Greek woman, I thought it was the old woman from Drag Me To Hell. You're so funny, I love your daily ramblings.

  7. When I got to the old Greek woman, I thought it was the old woman from Drag Me To Hell. You're so funny, I love your daily ramblings.

  8. When I got to the old Greek woman, I thought it was the old woman from Drag Me To Hell. You're so funny, I love your daily ramblings.

  9. When I got to the old Greek woman, I thought it was the old woman from Drag Me To Hell. You're so funny, I love your daily ramblings.

  10. I now need to lie down. Excuse me, but...that was EXHAUSTING.

    1. That was just the AM. Here, let me fluff your pillow. xo

  11. "I'm going to bed" means:
    * clean up living room
    * put dishwasher on
    * ready the lunchboxes
    * write in Duncan's daycare book
    * feed the cats
    * make sure they're out of the living room for the night.
    * go upstairs and put the covers back on the kids, 'coz they've twisted and turned in bed and are now uncovered.
    * put away laundry
    * clean toilet upstairs
    * hang up clothes for the next day
    * take meds, give meds to Beloved (who's already in bed!)
    * flop down in bed for a bit of reading.

    Beloved says he's going to bed, gives the cats fresh water, goes upstairs, undresses and flops in bed.

    Multi-tasking? I can't do that, 'coz I'll mess up things. I'd rather do them string-wise than tangled, otherwise I'll end up tangled in chores.

    And uhm... I think Hestia means well and won't frown upon you ;-)
    Kali Spera.

  12. This post was everything wonderful, mostly b/c it's exactly what I feel this week.


    It's the schools: with their papers, their requests, their activities, their schedules, their volunteer hours.


    I am shaking from the piles and calendar entries and everything!!

    I miss the summer.


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