|Thanks to Overworked Supermom for posting this clip on her Facebook page. What a riot! Special thanks to Baby Blues for these hilarious parenting cartoons.|
Ok. I'll admit it. With Eldest, I was known to Micromomage quite a bit.
You're holding him wrong. He doesn't like that.
Don't - arrgh - no - watch - his head - his HEAD!
We can ONLY use $40/bottle Uber-Sensitive Baby Wash!
He JUST ate - stop bouncing him he's gonna spit upppp ...I TOLD YOU.
That onesie doesn't even match his outfit - what are you BLIND?
NO NO NO! You don't give a little one steak until he's at least 4 and has a full set of teeth!
He can't sleep in our bed - we'll smother him!
I make my own organic baby food for a reason - he only gets one shot at a healthy start!
He's too little for Cheerios..he'll choke! We'll be safe and wait until he's 3!
Then Middler came along - - - 7 years later.
It started again. Only this time - it wasn't AS bad.
Now the one liners were more like.
I don't remember! I have some kind of amnesia!
Where's Eldest? Just take care of him would you?
$40/bottle Baby wash? No way! Baby Aveeno will do just fine!
No - you are not giving him a bath - he only wants ME or he'll throw a fit and cry for hours!
How could technology change so much in 7 years?
Just bring him in bed with us already!
That doesn't look right to me.
I don't remember much - but you are definitely doing that wrong.
Go to the store and buy a 24 pack of Organic Baby Food - I don't have time to Puree all damn day!
JUST GIVE HIM TO ME. He needs someone who knows what they're doing!
He's 2 - cut his steak up really fine - he'll be ok - he has teeth, right?
Give him a bowl of Cheerios - there's a hole in them for a reason - it helps them to not choke. (faulty reasoning - and don't take this advice - this is a just a silly blog!)
Then I had Youngest just 13 months later and most micromomaging went out the door.
Oh, I don't care - just use the Men's Bodywash on him - I forgot to get babywash! (Oh stop it, I'm kidding....don't use soap at all...babies aren't dirty!) <--kidding again, calm down people!
Just take one of them from me and do something..play with them..nap with them..anything - please - I only have 2 arms for goodness sake! If I had 8 arms I would do it myself!
No he doesn't need a onesie - that's just more laundry for me!
Feed him yourself...give him a TBONE - give him something! (kidding, kidding!)
Bring them all in bed with us - just let me sleep!
Give him some babyfood - whatever you find at the store just buy it!
He can almost hold a spoon - give him a bowl of Cheerios and milk!
Help...anywhere...anything...just help me.
|See, when you give up some control, you can actually get some sleep!|
I can't help but laugh when I'm around new parents. (I have earned my right to giggle after 12 years of parenting - and I will admit this - the one thing I know after 12 years is that I KNOW NOTHING and I DO NOT GIVE ADVICE! That being said...) After nearly 40 weeks of bonding between mother and baby, it is only natural for mom to feel like she has to do everything. That's understandable. But the sooner you learn to lean on Dad for stuff, the better. I totally understand the need for control, but moms need help - so the sooner you ask for help the better. You can gently nudge and guide on how things should be done or how baby likes something a certain way - just communicate. The older the wee ones get, the easier it is to relinquish control over everything. Those first days/months/years are tough - those babies are so needy and so particular, but they'll be ok as long as someone loves them, cares for them, and pays attention to what they're doing! That's all the advice I am going to just barely give.
Now that the boys are getting older, I can't help but still micromomage when it comes to clothes. If Hubs picks out their clothes on that particular day, it is blatantly obvious. I don't know why it is so hard to pick out outfits that match. Maybe it's because I don't have any little girls that I so desperately want my boys to look nice...maybe it's because I am a bit of a fashionista myself and I feel like it's a hobby of mine - or perhaps it is because Hubs feels like the fact that they are dressed is good enough - I don't know. Regardless, it's the one thing I can't seem to let go of.
|See why I love this cartoon? I could've written this but I have zero drawing skills!|
I know this for sure. Being a Micromomager is EXHAUSTING. You want something done right, you do it yourself - but be prepared to have a lot more on your plate than most people can manage. Take for example when you get sick and have to stay in bed for a day (you cannot afford to be sick for more than a day or the household may collapse..but that's another blog for another day). You physically cannot keep up and must stay in bed. If you've controlled everything up until now, how is Hubby going to manage? Here are the important things to consider when it comes to the kids and letting go control to the Hubs. There are 3 important factors going through Hub's mind: Are they fed? Are they (somewhat )clean? Are they content? That's it. If they destroy every room in the house, including the kitchen - that doesn't get factored in to the equation - just the fact that their basic needs are being met. When you finally feel well enough to come downstairs from your Nyquil induced slumber, you will most likely be met by happy children and a very messy house. It happens.
There are things you can get worked up over that are worth getting worked up over - things like safety, good decisions, hygiene, etc. Then there are things not worth getting worked up over. You've got to weigh it all out in your head and think before you micromomage. The more you let go of control, the more help you are going to get. Encourage, empower, empathize. All good words to keep in mind. Being a parent is a learning process and it takes patience, love and effort on both parts to get to a happy place. It is so rewarding when you know you have a good partner to go through it with. (Maybe the fact that I was divorced when Eldest was merely 8 months old, showed me how very hard it is when you have no one to help, and made me appreciate someone who was there to support and love me through the parenting journey the second time around).
More Baby Blues cartoons - one of my absolute faves. http://babyblues.com/
Aren't we all just doing the best we can?
Until next time...go easy on yourselves (and your Hubbys) would ya? The world is hard enough as it is. We could all use a little help.
Cheers and Love,