Monday, July 28, 2014

An Oath to Market Basket


On this, the 28th of July, 2014, I, DG, do solemnly pledge to NEVER...EVER...complain about Market Basket again.  I just left Sam's Club because it was imperative that I shopped for groceries, since I, much like Old Mother Hubbard, had bare cupboards.  Because it was not my beloved Market Basket, I was confused, overwhelmed and found myself purchasing 60 pounds of bacon, at least 4000 waffles, and 25 gallons of Iced Coffee.  I cannot be trusted in these clubs.

 Do you want a profession of my love? You got it.  I love you Market Basket.  I love your hard working dedicated employees, your management, your drivers, your customer service & of course, your low, low prices.  Help me, Market Basket...you're my only hope.

In return I offer you this pledge to behave better in your store.....

I will not dread, loathe, whine or carry on about having to hit Market Basket on a weekend.  The same goes for midweek, Mondays, Fridays, firsts of the month, holidays, mornings, evenings, and every day and moment in between.


I will not use swear words as I circle the parking lot looking for any available space within three miles of the store.

I will wait my turn to get a cart, even if it means waiting for ten minutes and getting my ankles clipped by other passing carts.

I will not growl and grit my teeth while in the butter and cheese corner as people linger and hmm/haww over the difference between Neufch√Ętel and Cream Cheese.



I will not take offense to someone boxing me out of the yogurt section, or throwing elbows near the bags of chips.


I will make room for others when deciding between chicken or pork for dinner in the meat department.

I will certainly not become agitated by the unpleasant smell of cheese & seafood in the Deli department, nor will I lament over the deli ticket number being at least 24 numbers ahead of mine.


I will stay as far to the right of the aisle I am in, regardless of what other shoppers do.  I will be calm and courteous to the families that walk 5 people wide and block entire aisles at a time.

I will cordially greet every single stock boy with a smile & a hello, even if it means I scrape my shin on their flatbed.


I will be happy while shopping.  I will be nothing but happy.


I promise to honor and respect the frozen food section by not leaving the door open for too long to assess the ice cream selection, thus doing my part to keep the store energy efficient.


I will be careful not to smash into any other shoppers even during rush hour or gridlock in the produce aisle.

I will gladly take any of the 15 checkout lines available to me, and promise not to pull an optic nerve by rolling my eyes at the woman in front of me paying by check and taking thirty minutes to write it out.



I promise, with all of my being, that I will not screw up the Debit transaction like I do every g-d time I'm in there.  I will WAIT until the clerk tells me it's okay to slide and I will, like a good soldier, say - 'DEBIT, EXACT AMOUNT' when I feel the heavy glance of the checkout clerk upon me.

I promise not to succumb to my kids begging me to open the cookies while checking out.


I will graciously help load the bags into my cart, and I will not exhale loudly in exhaustion while waiting for the clerk to highlight my 4% savings and hand me my receipt.  I am ever so grateful for that 4%.

These things, I promise....please just get back to business as usual..and soon.


Yours in groceries, for life...
~DG



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"We Are Market Basket" set this Go Fund Me page up for the administrative assistants, office clerical workers, truck drivers and warehouse workers.
 Here is the link: http://www.gofundme.com/bzt0qk





8 comments:

  1. HEAR HEAR! I will not gag on the smell of roasting chickens when I'm there with the little old men at 7:30am.

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    1. When my babies were tiny I used to LOVE shopping there at 7 am - - so much easier! I loved the smell of chickens in the morning. (lol). Miss MB. :(

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  2. This is perfect! I have often complained, long and loud, about how hard it was for me to shop at Market Basket (being a Hannaford Girl for more than 25 years) BUT...Everything you highlighted about the MB experience is spot on, and the reason we all need MB back in business. Thanks for making this both funny and real. The CEO is ousted, and the employees go on strike? In a Greek Tragedy/Drama worthy of Shakespear? Long live Market Basket, and I promise that the next time I'm on my lunch break in our MB plaza I won't b*tch about how long it takes me in the express lane to pay for my sandwich.

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    1. Thanks doll...no more complaining...ever! (or at least until the holidays?) lol!

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  3. OMG DG!!! This can be the New Market basket Oath of a faihtful Customer!! When I first started shopping in mine out here it took forever to learn where everything was and then they screwed with my karma and expanded the store and relocated products to new places and I was like grrr .I promise not to grrr at anything they do ever again!!Now I'm spending hours in another store looking for stuff !!

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    1. No more grrrrrr-ing! I love it! Thanks Paula! :)

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  4. I promise not to complain about the stupid layout which causes me to criss cross the store because I forgot something.

    I will promise not to whine about not being able to find things and the fact that beans are in 3 separate places in the store.

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  5. Now I'm sad we don't have Market Basket here in the UK. It sounds like we're missing out on a treat!

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